My
devotion and connection with my animal friends is MUCH stronger than
with any people who have passed on, which probably explains why the
animal accounts are in greater detail and more frequent. I have suffered
a great deal of physical pain for 20 years. When my German Shepherd,
Shurla, first came to me, I promised her I'd take care of her for
the whole of her life.
So
through a divorce and much physical and emotional adversity, I somehow
managed to keep my promise and not take the easy way out by suicide,
even when it seemed the only answer to ceasing my pain. I even considered
"taking her with me," but could not bear to end her life
because of my inability to cope. When it came her time to naturally
pass over, I started the greatest research of my life - I had to know
that I'd see her again, not just hope. Through my reading, I came
to understand that there was too great a chance that I would never
see her again if I took my own life. The ironic outcome is that while
Shurla was alive, and now that she's in the spirit world, I mainly
carry on for her. I now know that when my natural time comes to cross
over, that she'll come to take me home.
My
first story regards my father who died of bowel cancer when I was
only 16. He firmly believed that he would overcome it, and I was naïve
enough to believe that he could. Around the time of his death, I had
a dream that was SO VIVID. There was a stairway going all the way
up into the heavens with people dressed in white robes.
Most
were walking up the stairs, while others were coming back down. My
father and I were walking up this seemingly endless staircase together.
About half way, I heard a voice tell me that I had gone as far as
I could, and had to go back down. This I did without question. The
only person I have told this experience to is my husband. I can see
the scene as clearly today, 18 years "down the track," as
I did back then.
My
only other human encounter was even briefer. Mary, a friend who passed
over due to kidney failure, had promised me that she would come back
to let me know there was definitely an afterlife. Although Mary was
very skeptical, I had enough faith for both of us, and then some.
About a month after she was called home, she came to me in a dream,
again very vivid. She was sitting in a chair, in a pretty dress, looking
much the same as when I knew her, except with a glow of health. I
asked how she was, to which she replied that "she was fine"
- the way she always spoke. I then awoke and realized she had kept
her promise.
My
husband, Brian and I took part in an "Alpha Dynamics" workshop
several years ago to try to help our health problems. I found that
I could control my pain for 24 hours by using this technique. We found
mental abilities in this state that astounded us. During my breaks
at work I would often go to the alpha state to recharge my batteries
and send healing to my sick German Shepherd, Shurla, at home. On one
of these occasions, she "told" me that she was sick of being
in pain and wanted to "die." In turn I let her know I understood
how much it hurt, and although I would miss her terribly, that if
she wanted to go, I would understand.
Four
days later, she lay in my arms lifeless. I had spent the entire night
before sitting vigil, trying to comfort her any way I possibly could.
Our vet, Margaret, came around midnight to check on her progress.
She advised me to seriously consider euthanasia then, but agreed that
our last-ditch try to save her life wouldn't have had time to take
effect. I had to give her that last chance to get better.
Shurla
was restless, in pain, and couldn't even keep her sight focused on
me. Occasionally, she would regain control for a few seconds to look
lovingly at me, and then she'd lose it again, and her eyes would start
to uncontrollably flicker.
Around
5.30am, I again called Margaret and asked her to come to stop her
suffering. Although this decision was devastating, the thought of
Shurla suffering any longer was unthinkable! When Margaret came and
tried to insert the needle, she told me that Shurla's veins had "dropped,"
and that meant she was really sick and would have lived only a short
time. She told me Shurla was "fighting" the needle, and
I believe that this was because "at the last" she didn't
want to leave me, despite her condition.
As
I nursed her, she sighed her last, and it was over. My baby was gone.
I was alone.
I
went upstairs and lay down next to my husband who was fast asleep.
I physically felt pain in my solar plexus region. In my mind's eye
I pictured a long taloned claw had reached in and torn out a part
of me - a very precious part of me.
I
had often gone to church. I thought I believed in life after death
- but what about the creatures who share our lives and this earth?
I hoped I would see Shurla again, but I needed to KNOW.
In
my mind's eye I saw her everywhere, in the living room, her favourite
spots under the house, and in the back of the car. Even going down
the street I relived walks with her - but I knew she was no longer
by my side. My home was dead. I needed a dog, if only to help ease
the "dead quiet," the lifeless homecomings, and the constant
affirmation that my Shurla was no longer with me. Therefore, I went
to the SPCA and brought home a German Shepherd cross, male puppy.
He needed a home, and I needed a dog.
Brutus,
as I called him, did his job well. He helped fill a void in my lonely,
abandoned heart. One night, about a month after Shurla passed over,
I was fixing Brutus' dinner and felt him come sniffing behind me (from
left to right side). My instant thought was that he had started a
habit that Shurla had always done. She would come sniffing around
my back from the left to the right - every time, in curiosity to see
what was for dinner.
I
turned round to give him a pat and hug - no one visible was there.
Brutus was lying several feet to the front of me, rolling on his back,
having a wonderful game with himself. There was NO PHYSICAL WAY he
could have touched me and moved that quickly away. I felt Shurla's
presence, and knew it was her, showing herself to me in an intimate
way so I would believe she was okay. I realized it happened just outside
one of her favourite spots, when I was busy, but not preoccupied -
just in the right frame of mind to be open to receive her contact.
Tears
of joy sprang to my eyes. This was so important to me because of the
guilt I was experiencing for "taking her life," especially
when I was told that she was fighting the lethal injection. I knew
then that she understood and still loved me.
Despite
Shurla's contact, for months I had nightmares of her "being buried
alive" and trying to dig her way back out to me. These were thankfully
relieved with dreams (which I now believe to be ADC's - After Death
Communications) of her running through lush, green pasture towards
me.
Although
Shurla's visitation was a great comfort to me, I continued to research
Near Death Experiences (NDE's) and anything on animals in the spirit
world. Although it's very rare to come across such literature, I now
have a few books devoted to this topic.
This
happened 12 years ago last October. Since then, I have done much research
on this topic and raised and cared for orphaned wildlife. Some survive
to be released back into the wild. Unfortunately others weren't strong
enough and died. Whenever an animal we're caring for seems to be getting
worse, I talk quietly to it, describing the paradise they will be
going home to. These "deaths" always seem to be easier.
